Self-Care Is Being Selective About the People You Keep Around

by Juliet Belkin

Meditation, pampering, and exercise are all forms of self-care we hear of often today. All that is indeed great for our body and soul, but there is one thing we don’t pay close attention to is who we surround ourselves with. Most of us don’t believe people around us can impact in significant ways, but they can. Life’s too short to spend it with sh”tty friends, so limit your social circles and surround yourself with the best support system.

When it comes to friends, choose quality over quantity. Make a list of those who deplete you and cut ties with them. Yes, it sounds harsh, but wasting time on people who don’t add value to your life is a waste.

The world supplies us with energy to achieve our goals. But we tend to waste it on other things. Eventually, we have no energy left for goals and happiness. Where does this energy go? A big part of our energy we exchange with other people and often support their dreams and desires. Generally, people always exchange energy and it's a normal phenomenon. But it is important to avoid an overdo.

Resentment is the first thing that feeds on our energy. When we are angry, offended, when we cannot forgive - we open the energy channel in our inner selves. And this channel is like a vacuum that begins to suck in our energy. The more we get angry, the more energy we give away. But the paradox is; we are offended, we can not forgive, but the other person becomes more successful. After all, we fed him/her with the energy. Every time you think about the person who offended you, he or she receives more of our vibrations. And often they can help. You must have come across a situation when you just completed meditation of forgiveness, you forgive and forget, and suddenly you get a phone call from the person who was wrong. Why? Because they feel the loss of energy and support and they are now trying to get it back. That is why it is very important to learn to forgive and forget.

Every time sadness, grievances rolls over you, instead of scolding the wrongdoer, silently thank them. It will be difficult at first, but with the time you will see the effect. There is always something to thank wrongdoers for, no matter what they did. They are our teachers, they are the lesson that we had to face in life. We are the ones who pulled them into our lives. One other argument is that gratitude strengthens our energy and gives additional support!

So, ta ta to drama queens in your life, goodbyes to the one who gets off on other's failures, and dazvidaniya to toxic, vampiristic “friend”. Negativity is contagious and only brings pain into your life. So surround yourself with reliable friends who genuinely have your best interests at heart, cheer for your accomplishments like they're their own, and challenge you to be the best version of yourself. 

HOW TO SURVIVE YOGA

Everyone is into Yoga these days. Why? Because all of us probably did a research and know that Yoga is a group of physical, mental, and spiritual practices originated in ancient India and that it is amazing for our health for so many reasons. But Yoga is not as simple as it looks. And for us, beginners, we often come out of the class exhausted and embarassed, because we couldn't do what half of the class easily did.

Here is what you need to remember:

Yoga is a practice. It is not about nailing a pose or having perfect form. It is about breathing deep, letting go, and feeling good.

I know it's easy said than done. So, here are 10 tips for surviving your first yoga class.

1. AVOID EATING HEAVY FOOD AT LEAST ONE HOUR BEFORE THE CLASS Just compare eating yogurt or banana before the class and eating a heavy meal, or even a light sandwich. You will be so uncomfortable, I promise you. Been there, done that. (Avoid gassy food, for obvious reasons...)

2. WATER, LOTS OF IT. BEFORE THE CLASS. NOT DURING. Drinking water helps to keep you hydrated. Yes. This is especially important if you are starting a Bikhram yoga. Not enough water in your body guarantees you a lightheadedness, nausea, body shaking and all that unpleasant stuff. That will also help you to avoid drinking water during the class. Drinking water during the class can make you feel heavier.

3. REVIEW YOGA POSES ONLINE BEFORE COMING it's a good idea to have some working knowledge of the fundamental yoga poses before stepping onto the mat. Every teacher is different, every class is different. Pull up that "Yoga for Beginners" video and glance over to know what to expect.

4. SLOW DOWN Slowing down is essential, especially for those who are just starting. Rushing and doing a pose incorrectly will have no result. Take your time and most importantly ignore the show offs, there are always people like that. No, you can't hold this pose for longer than 2 seconds, don't. Put your foot down, find the balance and do it again. IT'S OK! Noone is judging, noone cares. They are all concentrated on their pose.

5. BREATHE It is said that if you breathe 15 times per minute, you will live to 75 or 80 years. If you breathe 10 times per minute you will live to 100. The speed at which you breathe will dictate the length of life. If you breathe fast, your life will be shortened. This is why dogs have short lives. Capishe?!